Shame and prejudice

The last 2 years that I moved back in Vrilissia I have been buying my pet supplies from a particular old and outdated pet shop simply because the lady that run has dedicated her life in helping stray animals. In late 2008 she retired. The shop is now run by the owner. Not an animal lover as the retired lady but out of habit i kept going there. A few days ago when I went for my weekly shopping she asked me if I knew someone to run the shop in the afternoons so she does not have to do it. I told her I knew someone that I could recommend on her competence, loyalty and morality. She was excited. Really? Who is she? I told her my cleaning lady, a very sweet 23-year old albanian girl. Then the oh so shameful happened: She frawned. And gave a really ugly grimace originating from her prejudice against immigrants, especially albanians. That of discust and dismissing it without even blinking. I was so ashamed. To be of the same nationality as she was..
Needless to say, she will not be having my custom again. Prejudice walls will not fall if all of us do not make it our own purpose.

The problem of overdelivering

When I had my first official performance appraisal as an employee, I was already 29 years old! I had to go to the UK for me to work with people who engage in what is widely known as an appraisal review. I did not think much of it back then, I thought it was a waste of time. After all, how dared anyone criticised the quality of my work? After all, I am perfect!!!!!!
I always gave people what they asked me and in most jobs I held I would give them more than they asked me. During my consulting years, I would spend days and nights awake to make sure to meet that deadline without charging the extra time to the company and hence to the customer.
At my first official performance appraisal, I was in for a big surprise. There it was in bold letter, my first official negative criticism. I overdeliver. When I first read it, I thought it was a mistake. Of course there were about 10 strong points for me and 3 negative. The other two were behavioral characteristics, mainly related to stress. For many years though I could not understand whY the overdelivery was under the negative part. I thought that the guy - my manager - just had to write something down.

Eight years later, I understand why overdelivery is a major drawback. First, you don't get to bill the customer for extra work. Major problem in any business. It is like giving away things for free.
It is ok to lure the customer but for a paying project it definitely is not. Then, everything we give loses their true value. If for instance we pay 100 euros and we expect to have a two-person meal with one bottle of wine, and for 100 euros we get the meal, the wine but also the theater tickets, the next time we will have to pay for the theater, that will not go down quietly. Hence problems occur

Overdelivery also means when someone is giving away things the other one did not ask. At least not in the quantity - or quality - that they are given. Or the timing. Everybody wants to have clean running water off their tap. They want to be able to consume that water whenever they are thirsty. They don't want the water to run all the time off their tap.
If there is running water twenty four/seven, chances are the appartment at some point will flood. Not to mention a huge bill and a very bad environmental practice.

It took me many years to understand and realize why it was wrong, and why it is even worse to expect the other to deliver - let alone the over part - in relationships. It is like taking people for granted, them or their wishes.

Setting the frame straight in a human relationship is as important as keeping ourselves within the scope of comissioned work. In both cases people will have to know what to expect and we must not go beyond or below expectations because the balance will be lost. Once the balance is lost it will be very hard to restore.

For this reason I have found that it is important to have a 'contract' to establish the roles and the expectations in a relationship straight from the start. Unfortunately, I have failed to do that outside of a work setting, but I am trying. It is true that for one thing feelings are harder to control than deliverables, but expectations should not be that more different to manage than any contractual obligations if addressed explicitly and agreed by both parties.

Just a bit of food for thought.

Sometimes, less is so much more.

Fab Jill saves the night

I understand that Michelle dresses down in order for the voters not to believe that the Obamas' wallet is fashion deep, but then again so does Barack. Only that he is classy and she is far from it. Thank God that Jill Biden has much better fashion sense.
And this has nothing to do about triviality of fashion. It has to do with aesthetics. Jill not only has good taste - marrying Biden proves the point as he is the best groomed politician and a very classy gentleman - but her choice of her sensual red gown was a clear political choice. The gown was created by Libanese designer Reem Acra. Michelle can definitely do better than what she does. Classy does not mean expensive. It can mean beautiful, smart, sensual and as Jill dared us, political. As far as to what the political message was, I leave it to you to connect the dots :-)

Once a wolf always a wolf

Microsoft is again the buzzword of european anti-trust courts. They are now including internet explorer as a bundle for their windows software.
This is how they became so big. I understand anti-trust laws etc etc
So what? They will pay the fine. And will continue business as usual. After all, it is the law of the sea: big fish eats small fish.
BTW, I use mozilla, even though my laptop is operating in a microsoft windows environment and internet explorer was offered there. So what? I downloaded mozilla and off I go. So, the truth actually is that Microsoft did not deprive me - the consumer - the choice. Even though I am not a big fan of the software house, I find all these law suits a bit useless and pointless.
I would be more interested to have someone come up with a more reliable operating system than windows (well linux is) that is equally user friendly (well linux isn't) and they could bundle armagedon if they liked..

Heineken's version of Sex and the City

my 2008 top ten worst experiences

1. Amy's death
2. Dad's heart problems & hospitalization
3. my family's economic problems
4. Aunt Mary's hospital flirt
5. Fires in Athens
6. Dimitri's car crash
7. Animal abuse
8. Greek government performance
9. Chinese occupation in Thibet not abolished
10. Zimbambwe's continuous amputation

my 2008 top ten best experiences

1. Zizou & Klelia's negative Kalaa-zar test, Oct



2. AEK - OLYMPIAKOS 4-0

3. Athens 10k parallel race to the Athens Classic Marathon, Nov 9


4. Obama acceptance speech, Denver Nov 4

5. Madonna Sticky and Sweet concert, Athens OAKA stadium Sep 27


6. Photographic tours of Paris & San Francisco, 2nd & 4th weeks of Aug

7. John Digweed performance, Cavo Paradiso, Myconos Jul 30

8. Heath Ledger's Joker performance in Batman, the Dark Knight


9. Obama's president elect speech, Chicago, Nov 11

10. Myconos holidays Jul30 - Aug 4

Greeks' comfort zone

The Greek flag is white and blue to represent the sea waves and the foam. The five horizontal blue stripes represent the five seas. The cross is the reference to the orthodox religion that Greeks are baptized into since early age*
This trivia piece of information only to elaborate the point that Greece is a naval country and its people have close connections to the sea.

Now take a mental tour away from Athens, fly over the Balkans or Northern Italy and reach Switzerland. The heart of Europe, a beautiful, rich, mainly mountainous country. Dominated by the Swiss alps. None other alpine village - or small town - is as famous as Gstaad. Probably not famous as a ski resort - French, Italian, Austrian or other swiss towns are more famous about their pists. Gstaad is famous about the rich and famous, its cosmopolitan atmosphere and the luxurious chalets. People do ski there and I would expect to have the highest concentration in the world of chanel ski sets (yes, the fashion house does design skis and ski uniforms) but skiing seems not to be the favorite passtime

I would also expect that Greeks would make up of a high proportion of the population of Gstaad. I would also expect to hang out with each other. What I would not expect is that the 'greek hanging out place' in Gstaad would be called 'The Gstaad Yaught Club'**. Talk about comfort zone.....Unlike most other yaught clubs that exist in the world though, no sailing boats are to be seen anywhere near it..You can check it out here: http://www.gstaadyachtclub.com/






NB: *(about the non-separation of state and church I will revert to a different posting - too big of a topic to discuss here)
**I swear of not making it up. I have been informed by a Gstaad permanent resident (half greek).

My first vinyl album

I think I was about eleven or twelve when I bought myself, with my own pocket money, my first vinyl album. Yes, back then the delivery mechanism for music was the LP - or the single - in black round vinyl disks.
I actually went with my brother - the two of us - to shop. Alone. For the first time in our lives. I had no idea back then that the title song of the album that I had bought would be one of the most classic of all the one time classic songs. Unfortunately so.
The year was somewhere in the early eighties. The group was Human League. The song was Lebanon (Top3 in UK charts the first week of release despite boycotting from UK radio at the time and with no MTV to broadcast; this tells you something about the song)

Great song, gloomy topic, still relevant, geography slightly different. All great art is always relevant. Unfortunately in this case, this is a great work of art that I would have loved to put in some old drawer and never listen to again. I have bought many LPs, and CDs later on. I think the lyrics of this songs are the ones that I will never forget. Unfortunately!

Does Christianity live in a shopping mall?

Christmas is in our religion (by 'our' I mean all the different flavors of Christianity) the day that Jesus was born in a very humble shack, in a stable actually, warmed by the breath of the animals, lighted by the star, and showered by the magicians presents. All in modesty, humbleness, religious ecstasy, family love, quietness, with the bright light of a solitary star intruding the darkness of the night.
Now tell me, where do all these Christmasy symbols find their place in 'our' Christmas? I would think that the Japanese celebrating their fashion-victimness with yet another shopping spree, labeling it 'Christmas shopping' is alright. After all, they are not Christian.
Yet for us, Christians, the period around Christmas holidays, is usually the period where most depression attacks are registered and would not be surprised if it was the time where most suicides are recorded in Norway.
The spirit of Christmas commands from us all to be jolly, happy, surrounded by at least three kids that will open their presents on christmas day, an extended family where there are at least 4-5 couples with 4-5 offsprings each, mothers-in-law are not ball breakers, a chalet up on the mountain with a huge fireplace, a golden retriever that will sit quietly by the fireplace the entire evening (next to it without suffocating) and its sole movement will be to occasionally lick someone or wave the tail (the rest of the time it does not move, does not dirt, does not shed). In addition, there is a huge 4x4 SUV in the chalet garage, everybody is a wonderful skier and nobody gets chopped lips and face from the freaking cold.

I think this type of Christmas exists only in commercials. The depressions hit because we mistake the 'commercial type-Christmas' with 'commercial Christmas'. Unfortunately, most recently we can not have the money to buy the presents. And lately the kids are asking play station III or super nintendos - not just a fire brigade or a doll from Santa.

The problem is that at times like this, where Santa has run out of money, it is depressing to make a kid sad. A present needs to be bought. At all costs. Or the parents need to spill the beans: Santa is not real!!! (I think that revelation alone explains the anger of 15-year old Athenians...)

The conclusion is that on a period of financial crisis, Christmas period is harsh on most people. Harsh because most of us will fail to deliver as our role promises. Or at least the delivery will not be as great as it was previous years. Because there is so deeply routed in our westernized soul that we can get by our wrongdoings all year long as long as we deliver our Santa promise. Hence the real legacy of Christmas is lost and misunderstood.

In order for one to be happy, one must have a 4-member family, a mountain house, an SUV, a six digit bank account, patience in light installation and holiday decoration, shouting wealth, exhibition, festive spirit, hedonism etc. None of these qualities have anything to do with Christmas. On the contrary, Christmas, the birth of Christ, was the promise of a hope that God would liberate humans from all these musts and should dos, all these societal directives that all they serve for is to discriminate against the poor, the single and the different. Jesus was born for all, quietly, in his small shack, warmed by the breath of moving animals and showered by the symbolic gifts of the three magicians that came to pay their respects.

No SUVs, no trees, no golden lights, no santas, no fireplace, no fiestas.

My question now is: Why on earth do all these new shopping malls mushroom up in the period that most people get depressed when passing in front of a shop? Christmas is deprived of the true miracle of Genesis and the hope that His birth represented. The devil is taking over. Unlike what most people think, modern devil is disguised in small square plastic cards, especially active in large, bright, luxurious, plentiful, colorful, christmas decorated, over-advertised, window-lacking shopping malls.


PS: Frankly, thinking about it, X-mas is more a single than a family holiday (single folks flats do not have the sparkle, ribbons, trees, lights, etc of family homes during xmas)